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	<title>Top 20 Training &#187; Blog History</title>
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		<title>The Power of Choice Leads to Engagement</title>
		<link>http://www.top20training.com/2010/04/26/the-power-of-choice-leads-to-engagement/</link>
		<comments>http://www.top20training.com/2010/04/26/the-power-of-choice-leads-to-engagement/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 26 Apr 2010 23:02:49 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mike Nead</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog History]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.top20training.com/?p=900</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[by Paul Bernabei
Students who are engaged possess the power to make a positive difference in their lives. This power stems from their thinking, which impacts the positive and negative ways they experience school, relationships and other life experiences. Consequently, it is by being aware of their thinking that they discover the power of choice.
Top 20 [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<h2><span style="font-size: small;">by Paul Bernabei</span><a href="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/thinking.jpg"><span style="font-size: medium;"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-910" title="thinking" src="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/thinking-300x199.jpg" alt="" width="341" height="238" /></span></a></h2>
<p><span style="font-size: large;">Students who are engaged</span> possess the power to make a positive difference in their lives. This power stems from their thinking, which impacts the positive and negative ways they experience school, relationships and other life experiences. Consequently, it is by being aware of their thinking that they discover <span style="font-size: large;">the power of choice</span>.</p>
<p><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: small;">Top 20 Training</span> </span>has provided thousands of teachers throughout the country with a practical tool to help students become aware of their thinking and discover the power of choice. Elementary, middle and high school teachers are using<em><span style="font-size: large;"> </span></em><em><span style="font-size: large;"><span style="font-size: medium;"><strong>Above and Below the Line</strong></span></span></em> to awaken students to their thinking and their ability to make better decisions.</p>
<p>In doing so, they are providing students with the ability to <span style="font-size: medium;">develop positive mental habits (curiosity, motivation, focus and persistence) </span><span style="font-size: medium;">and eliminate negative mental habits (blame, procrastination, boredom and self-doubt) </span>from their lives. Fueled by positive mental habits, students take more responsibility in leading their lives in a healthier and more productive direction.</p>
<p><span style="font-size: large;"><a href="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/studying1.jpg"><img class="alignleft size-medium wp-image-926" title="studying" src="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/studying1-300x199.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="199" /></a>In the process of becoming aware of their thinking,</span> they also discover when their thinking is not working in their best interest. At times that awareness alone helps them put on the brakes and avoid the messes that often come from poor decisions. By understanding when they are Above or Below the Line, students discover their ability to be authors of their lives rather than characters in someone else’s story. By being able to govern their thinking, they are able to govern their experiences.</p>
<p style="text-align: left;">Although all students benefit from this awareness of thinking, it is particularly helpful to young people who have seemingly given up hope. Hopeless and <span style="font-size: medium;">discouraged youth are prime candidates to disengage</span>, which often has a lasting negative impact on their experiences in school, relationships and life. However, when empowered by the realization that their thinking makes a difference in their lives, <span style="font-size: medium;">the rediscovery of the power of choice encourages them to once again ‘show up’ and engage. <br />
</span><a href="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/TOP-20-TRAINING-June_Aug_2010.pdf"><em>Click here</em></a><em> to learn more about our upcoming training sessions and other topics that will be covered.</em></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><img class="size-medium wp-image-904 aligncenter" title="ATL BTL edit" src="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/ATL-BTL-edit1-300x163.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="163" /></p>
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		<title>Roadblock to Success: I AM STUPID!</title>
		<link>http://www.top20training.com/2010/04/12/roadblock-to-success-i-am-stupid/</link>
		<comments>http://www.top20training.com/2010/04/12/roadblock-to-success-i-am-stupid/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 12 Apr 2010 18:40:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mike Nead</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog History]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.top20training.com/?p=852</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[by Paul Bernabei
An epidemic that continues to go undiagnosed in American schools is how students from all stages of the academic achievement spectrum experience feelings of stupid. Although this disease diminishes the potential of all students, it is deadly for young people who experience feelings of stupid on a daily basis…and many do.
For these students, [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<h2 style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: medium;">by Paul Bernabei</span></h2>
<p><a href="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/DISENGAGED001.jpg"><span style="font-size: medium;"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-868" title="DISENGAGED001" src="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/DISENGAGED001-300x200.jpg" alt="" width="289" height="182" /></span></a><span style="font-size: large;">An epidemic</span> that continues to go undiagnosed in American schools is how students from all stages of the academic achievement spectrum experience feelings of stupid. Although this disease diminishes the potential of all students, it is deadly for young people who experience feelings of stupid on a daily basis…and many do.</p>
<p>For these students, quitting school or disengaging while attending school is an understandable yet personally damaging response.</p>
<p>Based on research from students throughout the country, Top 20 Training has identified <span style="font-size: large;">eight ways</span> students react to feelings of stupid and <span style="font-size: large;">five causes</span> of feelings of stupid.</p>
<h3><span style="font-size: large;">Reactions to Feeling Stupid:</span></h3>
<p>When students feel stupid, they predictably react in one of eight ways.</p>
<p>1. <span style="font-size: medium;">The withdraw.</span> They quit school or they <span style="font-size: medium;">disengage</span> while they are in school. They find ways to remain invisible even when they show up for school. They don’t raise their hands when they don’t know something. They don’t sign up for classes or participate in co-curricular activities that might be challenging.</p>
<p>2. <span style="font-size: medium;">They pretend.</span> They pretend to know something when they really don’t. They pretend to be able to do something when they really can’t.<a href="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/blackboard.jpg"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-869" title="blackboard" src="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/blackboard-300x199.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="199" /></a></p>
<p>3. <span style="font-size: medium;">They become emotional.</span> They are embarrassed, angry, upset, sad, worried, nervous or stressed.</p>
<p>4. <span style="font-size: medium;">They judge themselves:</span> I’m not good enough; I don’t know anything; I’m bad at everything; I am stupid.</p>
<p>5. <span style="font-size: medium;">They attack others.</span> They argue with or challenge teachers. They bully other students in the hallway or cafeteria, on the playground or bus, or online.</p>
<p>6. <span style="font-size: medium;">They become defensive. </span>They make judgments of teachers and classes &#8212; “This class is stupid…My teacher is stupid.”</p>
<p>7. <span style="font-size: medium;">They may be motivated</span> to do better in school. They may study harder for the next test. However, they continue to carry within them the feeling of being stupid.</p>
<p>8. <span style="font-size: medium;">They become numb</span> because being numb is better than dumb. They choose to be apathetic or use alcohol or drugs to deaden the feelings of stupid.</p>
<h3><span style="font-size: large;">Causes of Stupid:</span></h3>
<p>Top 20 Training has identified five causes of stupid.</p>
<p>1. <span style="font-size: medium;">Called:</span> Students are called stupid or other words that mean the same thing like &#8217;dumb&#8217; or &#8216;idiot&#8217;. They are laughed at or experience non-verbal responses from teachers.</p>
<p>2. <span style="font-size: medium;">Comparison:</span> Students are compared to others or compare themselves to others. Typically these comparisons result in students judging themselves: “I’m not good enough.</p>
<p>3. <span style="font-size: medium;">Confusion: </span>Students feel stupid when they don’t get it and are confused. Although confusion is a natural part of all learning, most students have come to believe that confusion is a sign of their stupidity.</p>
<p>4. <span style="font-size: medium;">Can’t: </span>Students can’t do certain things. Their failure or mistakes make them feel stupid. As a result, they often avoid activities or situations where they cannot easily succeed.</p>
<p>5. <span style="font-size: medium;">Certain situations: </span>Students feel stupid when they experience certain situations like reading aloud in class or needing help.</p>
<h3><span style="font-size: large;">Teacher Tips for Overcoming Stupid:<a href="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/kid-pointing-to-head.jpg"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-870" title="Boy twist by finger near temple" src="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/kid-pointing-to-head-300x277.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="277" /></a></span></h3>
<p>Top 20 Training is working with teachers in thousands of schools to reduce the negative impact stupid has on students lives and learning.</p>
<p>1. Top 20 Training is initiating professional conversations among educators to:<br />
(a) become aware of stupid and<br />
(b) consider ways to reduce student experiences of stupid.</p>
<p>2. Top 20 Training is encouraging educators to make &#8220;stupid&#8221; part of the curriculum: <br />
(a) For teachers to share their own personal experiences of feeling stupid and to teach the 5 causes of stupid.<br />
(b) For teachers to explain how ‘comparison’ can lead to learning and the importance of ‘confusion’ in learning.<br />
(c) For teachers to stress the value of failure and mistakes to learning and growing.</p>
<p>3. Top 20 Training is helping teachers and students be aware of when stupid is more likely to appear. For example, when students may have done poorly on an exam and when new and more challenging material is about to be presented.</p>
<p>4. Top20 Training is challenging teachers to help ALL students discover how they are smart.</p>
<p><a href="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/TOP-20-TRAINING-June_Aug_2010.pdf">Click here</a> to learn more about our upcoming training sessions and other topics that will be covered.</p>
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		<title>The Frame and Professional Decision-making</title>
		<link>http://www.top20training.com/2010/04/03/the-frame-and-professional-decision-making/</link>
		<comments>http://www.top20training.com/2010/04/03/the-frame-and-professional-decision-making/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 04 Apr 2010 04:46:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mike Nead</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog History]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.top20training.com/?p=831</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[by Paul Bernabei
Heidi Foley, principal of Holy Angels Academy, uses the Top 20 Frame model of See-Feel-Do-Get to affect professional decision-making regarding student achievement.
 In her presentation Data-informed Instruction with Professional Learning Communities and Common Assessments at the National Catholic Education Association Conference on April 17th, Heidi will pose the question, “What do we do when [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: medium;">by Paul Bernabei</span></p>
<hr />Heidi Foley, principal of Holy Angels Academy, uses the Top 20 Frame model of See-Feel-Do-Get to affect professional decision-making regarding student achievement.</p>
<p> In her presentation <em>Data-informed Instruction with Professional Learning Communities and Common Assessments</em> at the National Catholic Education Association Conference on April 17th, Heidi will pose the question, “What do we do when student achievement data has not reached the standard we want it to be?”</p>
<p>When teachers know what students have learned and what they have not learned, they can respond as Bottom 80s or Top 20s. As Bottom 80s, they can: </p>
<p>1. Change nothing and continue to teach their students with the same methods and strategies that failed to get desired results in the first place.</p>
<p>2. Have their need to be right activated and give away power by blaming the students: “The kids didn’t study enough.” They can even see themselves as victims: “There’s too<a href="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/Slide43.jpg"><img class="alignright size-medium wp-image-678" title="Slide43" src="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/Slide43-300x225.jpg" alt="" width="423" height="310" /></a> much to do. I don’t have enough time to teach all this and do everything else.” This results in their being stuck in yuck.</p>
<p> Another option is to operate as Top 20s.</p>
<p>They can get curious and change how they see the situation and their students. They can analyze the data to see what worked in the classroom and what didn’t. They can even check in with their students for their opinion about what didn’t work and what might be more effective. By avoiding blame and maintaining curiosity, they will see it differently and do it differently. As such, they are more likely to make a positive difference in their students’ achievement and experience.</p>
<p> If you&#8217;d like to learn more about the Frame and other powerful Top 20 concepts, register for one of our training sessions this summer.</p>
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		<title>Top 20s and Potential</title>
		<link>http://www.top20training.com/2010/02/10/a-new-formula-for-success/</link>
		<comments>http://www.top20training.com/2010/02/10/a-new-formula-for-success/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 10 Feb 2010 18:45:56 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mike Nead</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog History]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.top20training.com/?p=18</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Potential is a power inside each person that waits and waits and waits to get activated and, when it does, comes out
to make a positive difference in the quality of his or her life, relationships, and experiences.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src='http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/plugins/simple-post-thumbnails/timthumb.php?src=/website/wp-content/thumbnails/18.png&amp;w=200&amp;h=150&amp;zc=1&amp;ft=jpg' alt='post thumbnail' /></p>
<p style="text-align: center;">by Paul Bernabei</p>
<hr />
<h3>Top 20 people develop potential in themselves and others.</h3>
<h3>What is potential?</h3>
<p>Potential is a power inside each person that waits and waits and waits to get activated and, when it does, comes out to make a positive difference in the quality of his or her life, relationships, and experiences.</p>
<p>Furthermore, when potential develops in an individual, it makes a difference in the lives of other people as well. Potential, quite simply, is a power inside each person that wants to come out and make a positive difference in his or her life.<img class="size-full wp-image-356 alignright" title="StrongManContest copy" src="http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/StrongManContest-copy.jpg" alt="" width="231" height="336" /></p>
<h3>What happens to that potential?</h3>
<p>For some people, nothing happens to it. Although they have potential, it never get activated, its&#8217; not developing, and all of our training talks about reasons why that happens. For others, their potential develops at a normal rate. These people are doing okay. We call folks in these two groups the Bottom 80. But for people in a third group, their potential explodes. Their potential develops at an accelerated rate. They are the Top 20.</p>
<h3>What makes the difference between Top 20 and Bottom 80s?</h3>
<p>When we operate as a Top 20 person, we think, learn, and communicate, or TLC, in highly effective ways. When we operate as bottom 80s, our thinking, learning, and communicating is highly ineffective. In a real sense, each person is a Top 20. At times each person thinks, learns, and communicates in highly effective ways. Likewise, each person is a bottom 80 who, at times, thinks, learns, and communicates in highly ineffective ways.</p>
<p><strong>Consequently, when we use this Top 20 and Bottom 80 language, we are not comparing ourselves to other people. It&#8217;s simply a way of our understanding these two dimensions about ourselves</strong>: a Top 20 dimension when we TLC in highly effective ways and a Bottom 80 dimension when we TLC in highly ineffective ways.</p>
<p>The purpose of all Top 20 training and materials is to help people become aware of Top 20 and Bottom 80 ways of thinking, learning and communicating. We will all, at times, operate in Bottom 80 ineffective ways. However, with that awareness we can more quickly move back in the Top 20 direction and choose more effective ways of thinking, learning, and communicating.</p>
<p>.</p>
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		<title>A New Formula for Success</title>
		<link>http://www.top20training.com/2009/10/10/a-new-formula-for-success-2/</link>
		<comments>http://www.top20training.com/2009/10/10/a-new-formula-for-success-2/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 11 Oct 2009 04:48:36 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Mike Nead</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog History]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.top20training.com/website/?p=349</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[In our Top 20 formula S = I.Q. X E.Q., the S stands for Success. We are not thinking of success in terms of money, grades, power, or popularity. Rather, success is a good or positive experience in whatever you are presently involved in.
We define success in three ways:

Better thinking which develops your “self smarts.”
Better [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In our Top 20 formula S = I.Q. X E.Q., the S stands for Success. We are not thinking of success in terms of money, grades, power, or popularity. Rather, success is a good or positive experience in whatever you are presently involved in.<br />
We define success in three ways:</p>
<ul>
<li>Better thinking which develops your “self smarts.”</li>
<li>Better learning which develops your “school smarts.”</li>
<li>Better communicating which develops your “people smarts.”</li>
</ul>
<p>Success means that you do not experience an unhappy teenage life, but rather an interesting and memorable experience &#8212; a good ride. Success means that you do not experience failure in accomplishing your goals, but achieve your desired results. In the process of your total experience you develop qualities and talents and become more fully who you are capable of being. In short, successful living involves experiencing as many “ happy days” as possible.</p>
<h3>The Big Myth</h3>
<p>In school so much of what is focused on is related to your I.Q., your Intelligence Quotient. I.Q. means book smart, our natural brain power, which most people think is the major cause of success in school. You are usually graded and evaluated on I.Q. performance. Consequently, some students in the class feel disadvantaged.  They don’t think they have the smarts that someone else in the class may have. Therefore, they begin to believe that they can’t be as successful. This is the BIG MYTH.</p>
<p>I.Q. is not what makes the difference between the Top 20 and the Bottom 80. Rather, the biggest thing that separates the Top 20 from the rest is that they have more fully developed their E.Q., Emotional Quotient.</p>
<p>Fortunately, E.Q. is another way of being smart. E.Q. is being self smart, people smart, and a new way of being school smart. A person can be successful in spite of not having a high I.Q. if they develop their Emotional Intelligence. The<br />
good news is that Emotional Intelligence, unlike Intellectual Intelligence, can be developed and improved. There is a debate in education whether or not we can raise I.Q. We are not concerned about that debate because we know we can wake up your E.Q.</p>
<p>I.Q. and E.Q. can be compared to the wheels of a bicycle.  The back wheel drives the bike and the front wheel steers the bike. The back wheel represents our I.Q. and the front wheel our E.Q. Consequently, where we end up is determined by our E.Q., our front wheel. And it is this front wheel over which we have direct control when we grab the handle bars.</p>
<h3>The Anatomy of Your E.Q.</h3>
<p>Your E.Q. is made up of three important human characteristics:</p>
<p>EQ = Thinking + Learning + Communicating.</p>
<table style="width: 555px; height: 166px;" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0">
<tbody>
<tr>
<td width="11" height="22"> </td>
<td width="196">
<div><strong>Self Smart</strong></div>
</td>
<td width="163">
<div><strong>School Smart</strong></div>
</td>
<td width="185">
<div><strong>People Smart</strong></div>
</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td> </td>
<td valign="top">
<ul>
<li>Living with a positive attitude</li>
<li>Monitoring your moods and behavior</li>
<li>Improving self-confidence and motivation</li>
<li>Bouncing back from adversity</li>
</ul>
</td>
<td valign="top">
<ul>
<li>Finding relevancy</li>
<li>Eliminating boredom</li>
<li>Developing organizational skills</li>
<li>Making realizations</li>
</ul>
</td>
<td valign="top">
<ul>
<li>Getting along well with others</li>
<li>Listening and talking effectively</li>
<li>Resolving conflict</li>
<li>Becoming immune to negatve influences</li>
</ul>
</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table>
<h3>The Importance of EQ</h3>
<p>Let’s see if we can better understand the importance of E.Q. Imagine<br />
your I.Q. and E.Q. being on a scale of 1-10. If you have an average I.Q.<br />
of 5 and a low E.Q. of 2, your total success score will then be a 10.</p>
<p>Let’s take a look at a few examples:</p>
<table style="width: 617px; height: 39px;" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="10">
<tbody>
<tr>
<td bgcolor="#3366cc"><strong>Example 1:</strong> Sally is bright (I.Q. = <img src='http://www.top20training.com/website/wp-includes/images/smilies/icon_cool.gif' alt='8)' class='wp-smiley' /> and has<br />
her hand up all the time. She lacks friends because she is arrogant,<br />
boastful and irritates people. Sally doesn’t have many people<br />
skills (E.Q. = 2). Her success total is only 16.8 x 2 = 16<strong>Example 2:</strong> Meanwhile, behind Sally sits Andy who<br />
has average brainpower (I.Q. = 5). Andy never gets any A’s<br />
and struggles to get B’s and C’s. But he is dependable,<br />
trustworthy and brings out the best in others (E.Q. = 8). Notice<br />
that Andy’s success total is more than double that of Sally’s.5 x 8 = 40But what if Sally increased her E.Q.? What if<br />
she developed some of these Top 20 skills (E.Q.=8)? If so, Sally<br />
would quadruple the “ride” she is taking through high<br />
school.8 x 8 = 64</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table>
<p>The secret we want to reveal in this training is that you have the power to raise your E.Q. Therefore, you have the power to steer your bike towards greater success.</p>
<p>You have the power to create a great ride with great results.For many students there is a gap between<br />
their tested I.Q. and their G.P.A. In other words, many bright students are getting poor grades. Their I.Q.<br />
may be 8 but they are performing as if their I.Q. is 4. By increasing their E.Q., they begin to function intellectually at full capacity.  When students with average I.Q. become aware of this possibility, they<br />
see the opportunity for positive change in their own lives.</p>
<h3>Things They Never Told You</h3>
<p>An important part of life is problem-solving and most of life’s problems are E.Q. related. We know that when adults fail in the real world , it is usually not because they lack intelligence , but because they are unable to work effectively with other people. This is even more true in our family lives and friendships.</p>
<p>For people in leadership positions, E.Q. becomes even more crucial. But the paradox in our educational system is that the primary focus has been historically placed on I.Q. In this training, we are putting 100% of the focus on your E.Q.</p>
<table style="width: 632px; height: 118px;" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="10">
<tbody>
<tr>
<td height="118" bgcolor="#ffffcc">
<h3>Time for Action</h3>
<p>How would you rate yourself on the I.Q. and E.Q. scales (1-10)?</p>
<p>In which of the E.Q. areas do you most want to improve:<br />
Self-Smarts?  People-Smarts?  School-Smarts?</td>
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		<title>Taming False Beliefs: Lauren&#039;s Story</title>
		<link>http://www.top20training.com/2008/06/13/taming-false-beliefs/</link>
		<comments>http://www.top20training.com/2008/06/13/taming-false-beliefs/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 13 Jun 2008 19:48:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Paul Bernabei</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Blog History]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.top20training.com/?p=20</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Top 20 teens are aware of the messages they receive and the beliefs that form from these messages. Lauren, a high school freshman, is a great example of this. Here&#8217;s what she shared with her TLC teachers.
&#8220;Throughout eighth grade I had to deal with two boys continually calling me names and cracking fat jokes. At [...]]]></description>
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<p>Top 20 teens are aware of the messages they receive and the beliefs that form from these messages. Lauren, a high school freshman, is a great example of this. Here&#8217;s what she shared with her TLC teachers.</p>
<p>&#8220;Throughout eighth grade I had to deal with two boys continually calling me names and cracking fat jokes. At first I could blow it off easily, but after awhile it got to the point where I heard it every day. It got embedded in my mind and became unhealthy. Their message became a very strong belief. I wasn&#8217;t taking the right way out of this situation. I was giving them the power.&#8221;</p>
<p>What happened to Lauren is not unusual. It&#8217;s common for young people to be affected by what others say about them. Unknowingly, these messages can become false beliefs which cause much damage and unhappiness. Lauren used what she was learning in TLC class to tame her false belief. (See the Law of Conviction and Ease Up in <span style="text-decoration: underline;"><a title="Top 20 Teens book" href="http://www.top20training.com/?page_id=10" target="_self">Top 20 Teens</a></span>, p. 36-37.)</p>
<p>&#8220;I was a straight ten on this belief,&#8221; wrote Lauren. &#8220;I took a trip down to a six. I couldn&#8217;t believe how much happier I was. When I stopped constantly judging myself and thinking I&#8217;d never be good enough, I had time to be just plain happy. I&#8217;m still struggling with my self acceptance and appearance, but I&#8217;m trying my hardest to Ease Up even more.&#8221;<br />
<span id="more-20"></span><br />
How did Lauren lower her conviction of this damaging false belief? Here&#8217;s what she did in order to &#8220;ease up&#8221;:<br />
1. She stopped looking in mirrors so much.<br />
2. She stopped reading beauty magazines.<br />
3. She stopped comparing herself to other girls, especially famous ones.<br />
4. She stopped wishing she&#8217;d change instantly.<br />
5. She stopped wasting her happy days on hating her appearance.</p>
<p>Lauren used the TLC power within her to make a positive difference in her life. In doing so she left the land of the Bottom 80 and took up permanent residency in the Top 20.</p>
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